Ilotho entsha 2024: okuwinile kuqinisekisiwe!

Funny joke ilotho abadala etafuleni

Funny joke ilotho abadala etafuleni:

• Lesi sigqoko asilula - siyisigqoko sokugeza... (Ikepisi yeshawa).
• Uma ufuna i-hairstyle entsha, yithole, mngani... (Ikama).
• Into emangalisayo, phuma ungene embuthanweni, ukhululeke futhi uqale ukudansa ngokushesha, sijabule! (Umdanso).
• Uthole lo mklomelo - sukuma ucule ingoma kuwo wonke umuntu. (Cula iculo)
• Sihleke ngokusuka enhliziyweni - sitshele ihlaya. (Khuluma ihlaya).
• Lucky, unenhlanhla futhi ungamangali - gibela emlenzeni owodwa, ungamamatheka! (Gxuma ngomlenze owodwa).
• Umphefumulo kanye nomzimba kufanele kuhlanzeke, (Ijeli yokugeza) thola - futhi ugeze ngesibindi!
• Uyawathanda ophaya?, amaqebelengwane kashizi - thola (I-Vanillin), ngaphandle kwalo, wonke la mabhanisi awamnandi ngokwanele!
• Hhayi-ke, futhi unesipho esimnandi - usitholile (Ibha kashokoledi).
• Bonke abantu abaqotho kufanele bagcine imilomo yabo ihlelekile.. (Umuthi wokuxubha).
• Lokhu ukudla kwamaqhawe, wozani, lidle masinyane! (Iphakethe lephalishi elisheshayo).
• Lokho, yini ebhajwa phakathi kwamazinyo akho, uzohlala ekuthola. (I-Toothpick).
• Ingabe ufuna umhlwenga, njengebhubesi - thola (I-shampoo) Khona-ke!
• Asikho isidingo sokukhathazeka - wena (Iphakethe le-marmalade), kumnandi, sheshisa, ama-gummies amahle!
• Uyathanda ukwamukela izivakashi?, ukuhlobisa itafula kahle, ukuxazulula le nkinga wena (Amanabukeni) kufanele inikezwe!
• Ukuze izifundo zakho zihambe kahle, uya kuwe (Incwadi yokubhalela). Ungakwazi ukuxazulula izinkinga kuwo futhi ubhale ngokucophelela!
• Uma kuvele kube mnyama, ningesabi lutho. Thina (Ithoshi) sizokunika, uzokhanyisa wena.
• Ingabe ufuna ukuba namandla, njenge-gin, yithole, umfowethu, ivithamini. (Isaqathe).
• Ukuze kube khona abangani abangenakubalwa, Ngidinga ukudla ithani lika-anyanisi. Hhayi-ke, Kuzomele ngiqale! Futhi ngeke ugule. (U-anyanini).
• Unezingubo eziyikhulu, zonke izingubo ngaphandle fasteners. Sizokunikeza (Iklabishi) - isikhwama sakho semali ngeke sibe nalutho.
• Hhayi-ke, futhi lo mfo uyathola (Ikhukhamba), iqinile futhi i-crispy, akukho okumnandi emhlabeni.
• Lesi sipho ngesenkosazana, okwangempela kuphela, yonke into ibucayi, hhayi ukuzijabulisa - sikunikeza (I-Peas - eyomile noma embizeni).
• Uyawathanda amazambane?? Sizokunikeza okunye. Hlafuna, hlafuna - ungazamuli uphathe omakhelwane bakho. (1 amazambane tuber noma isikhwama chips).
• Izifo eziyikhulu zizophulukiswa ngalesi simangaliso - i-phentocide, i-staphylococcus izophuma, uma udla (Ugaliki).
• Inkukhu yadlula yalahlekelwa yiqanda., futhi iqanda akuyona nje elula - ushokoledi. (Iqanda likashokoledi).
• Wenza kahle ezifundweni zakho/emsebenzini/ - thola... (iphakethe lejusi).
• Ukuhlola umngane, udinga ukuhlafuna usawoti. Kuzodingeka udle iphawundi lonke, qala (Usawoti) - leyo!
• Ukuze sikhule sibe sikhulu, isidingo sokudla (Isi-Mandarin). Okugqamile, emnandi, isithelo esimnandi - faka emlonyeni wakho ngokushesha.
• Kwadlula indlovu muva nje, wangitshela iphupho elibi. Kungathi wahlala phansi ophahleni... Awu, futhi uyithumele kuwe (Igundane).
• Ilanga, umoya namanzi bangabangane bethu abakhulu! A, ukuze ungashayi ilanga ngenkathi uhamba, gqoka isigqoko se-panama futhi uthathe uhambo olupholile! (Isigqoko sephephandaba).
• Leli thikithi likunikeza indiza, indiza enkulu isuka iye esibhakabhakeni. (Indiza yephepha).
• Ukwenza impilo ibemnandi, sekuyisikhathi sokuyithokozisa! ukutholile (Ushukela ocolile), wonke umuntu angajabula naye.
• Bazokusiza ukuthi upende umhlaba ngemibala ehlukene (Amapende). Ngokushesha thatha ibhulashi bese upende inganekwane.
• Kuzodingeka uzame futhi ujabulise abantu, bingelela abavakashi, (Ithosi) sitshele masinyane!
• Ukuze umhluzi ube nephunga elimnandi, ngiyakudinga ngempela, ngaphandle (Ihlamvu le-bay) konke ukudla kuzoba kusha.
• Uma ufuna, ukuze isidlo sivuse isifiso sokudla, uzofaka izinongo (Upelepele), ukunambitheka kuzokumangaza kakhulu!
• Akukona nje ukuqondana ukuthi eMpumalanga le mifino iyahlonishwa, njenge-aphrodisiac (Isitshalo seqanda) ebizwa!
• Ukuze kungabikho ukuxabana, udle uphele (Utamatisi), uzojabula futhi uphile kahle, uzokhohlwa odokotela!
• Ukuze wonke umuntu endaweni athande isikhumba sakho, kulokhu ngokuqinisekile (Ukhilimu wesandla) izosiza njalo!
• Zihlanganiseni, bantu abaqotho, nisukume (Umdanso oyindilinga)! Kufanele uqale, asukume acule ingoma!

I-raffle edliwayo enamahlaya okuzalwa kubantu abadala

Dlala izibiliboco? Ukukhanya! Phatha izivakashi zakho ngemiklomelo edliwayo.

• Unenhlanhla enkulu Thola isemishi elimnandi. (isangweji)
• Lo mklomelo uye kuwe, Ukulala ebusuku. (ama-walnuts, ama-bagels noma ama-crackers)
• Bathi, kuthiwani ngegwebu?Konke kuzoba kuhle! (ubhiya)
• Phatha umakhelwane wakho, Isithandwa esinjalo. (uswidi)
• Umqhele we-laurel ngeke ukhanye kuwe, Futhi kuphela isikhwama bay amaqabunga. (Ihlamvu le-bay)
• Ungakuvumeli kube nzima kuwe, Isanqante esinamanzi sakho. (isaqathe)
• Asikho isiphuzo esingcono esitholakalayo manje sesizokuba ngesakho.. (ijusi)
• Ungabe usaba nesithukuthezi, Futhi uphuze itiye elimnandi. (itiye)
• Umona walaba abanezinyo elimnandi, Ngokuphambene nokugijima. (ushokoledi bar).
• Izinyembezi maziphume kuye kuphela, Imifino, ayigodli muntu. (ugaliki)
• Uyinadi eliqinile ukuqhekeka futhi asikho isidingo sokuhlekwa. (amantongomane)
• Nakuba lo khilimu ungadliwa, Iphunga limane lingenakuqhathaniswa! (ukhilimu kakhukhunathi)
• Lithembisa ukuthokoza Lona umvuzo! (iyogathi "Usla")
• Ivithamini yangempela ibalulekile empilweni. (amavithamini)
• Vumela umhlaba wonke ube nomona, Uthola i-kefir. (i-kefir)
• Awudingi ukujabula, I-mustard izokwehlisa umoya. (lwesinaphi)
• Yenza ubuso bakho bube lula, Phela wawina iqanda. (ukumangala)
• Futhi nge-dranik, kanye nesobho Iwusizo esikhundleni sokusanhlamvu.. (amazambane)
• Ungabi nesithukuthezi, umngane, Thatha uphaya eshalofini. (noma yimuphi umkhiqizo omnandi)
• Ingwejeje ikunikeze ipuleti lonke lezibiliboco. (ama-walnuts)
• Okuwinile kwakho kuyakhanya, kuyathakazelisa futhi kwaziwa kahle. (amaswidi)
• Ndizela kubhanana futhi ulindele imivuzo evela esimisweni! (ibhanana)
• Isithelo esenqatshelwe simnandi ukwedlula noma iyiphi ibha kashokoledi. (i-apula)
• Zithokozise ungadinwa, Phuza itiye lamaNdiya. (iphakethe letiye lamaNdiya)
• Ingabe nawe ukhona Fekla?? Ngoba unama-beet. (isithombo sebhitrudi)
• Ukuze lokho, ukuthi umkhulu, Uzothola ilolipop. (ilolipop)
• Kunzima ukuthi uvuke ekuseni? Kudingeka ugcine i-caffeine. (ikhofi)
• Izokukhokhisa ngesimo sengqondo, Ukuqiniswa okuhle. (ushokoledi ibha "Mars")
• Imbiza yejamu izokusindisa ebusika ngaphandle kokungabaza. (ujamu)
• Ama-mint pads sithandwa sethu. (ushingamu)
• 30. Futhi umnandi itiye, Futhi sijabulise izivakashi. (ushukela)

Umbhali uYulia Doronina, ikakhulukazi kusayithi "Phezulu", iqembu, angazi".

Izibikezelo ezimfushane zoNyaka Omusha 2024 kumalotho

Abanamandla abakhali, inhlanhla izoza kuwe futhi. (isicathulo samahhashi)

Njalo bheka phambili, imali eningi ikulindile. (imali ephuma ebhange lamahlaya)

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Kukhona indlela esheshayo eza kuwe, kuzoba nohambo oluningi. (noma iyiphi ikhithi yokuhamba)

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Hamba uye phambili ngesibindi, impumelelo enenhlanhla isivele ilindile. (isikhumbuzo, ngikufisela inhlanhla)

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Lindela izindaba ezinhle kubangani bakho abaseduze. (imvilophi enhle, ongafaka kuzo, Ngokwesibonelo, Ikhadi likaNcibijane)

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Kwamangala wonke umuntu, kukhona okungeziwe okulindile. (dummy)

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Noma ubani angajabula ngalokho. Uzothola ingcebo ngonyaka ozayo. (isifuba, ibhokisi, ibhokisi)

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Ngibona kahle, uzoba nomndeni omkhulu. (i-amulet yomndeni)

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Impela phakathi kwamabili, ngoSuku LukaNcibijane, inhlanhla yakho izohambisana. (iwashi elipholile, uphawu olusha iminyaka noma ama-sparklers)

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Bazokusiza ukuthi upende umhlaba ngemibala ehlukene (Amapende). Ngokushesha thatha ibhulashi bese upende inganekwane.

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Kuzodingeka uzame futhi ujabulise abantu, bingelela abavakashi, (Ithosi) sitshele masinyane!

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Ukuze umhluzi ube nephunga elimnandi, ngiyakudinga ngempela, ngaphandle (Ihlamvu le-bay) konke ukudla kuzoba kusha.

Uma ufuna, ukuze isidlo sivuse isifiso sokudla, uzofaka izinongo (Upelepele), ukunambitheka kuzokumangaza kakhulu!

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Akukona nje ukuqondana ukuthi eMpumalanga le mifino iyahlonishwa, njenge-aphrodisiac (Isitshalo seqanda) ebizwa!

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Ukuze kungabikho ukuxabana, udle uphele (Utamatisi), uzojabula futhi uphile kahle, uzokhohlwa odokotela!

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Inkomishi yenjabulo iyogcwala, zonke izifiso zizofezeka. (iqabunga, ipeni kanye ne-lighter - isethi yokwenza izifiso ngesikhathi se-chimes)

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Phambi kwabaphathi, uzofanele ube, ukuze isilingo sokudakwa siphele. (ibhodlela lotshwala)

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Esitolo, uzoyithatha, ibhulukwe likanokusho. (ibhande)

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Ngaphansi, izibuko zishayana, uzobe uzungezwe izihlobo. (izibuko/izibuko)

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Lapho ucezu lokugcina lweqhwa luncibilika, impilo izoba njengesithombe. (isithombe, amapende nge-albhamu, njll.. d.)

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Unyaka omdala usuyadlula, injabulo entsha iza. (noma yiluphi uphawu lwenjabulo, Ngokwesibonelo, kusuka esitolo se-feng shui)

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Ungalinge udabuke namuhla. Uzoba nabangane abaningi beqiniso. Bameme kaningi, angiphathe ngetiye elimnandi. (itiye, Ngingathola inkomishi?)

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Uthando olukhulu lulindile, uzophinde uthole injabulo. (uphawu "inhliziyo" (umcamelo, i-keychain, uzibuthe njll. d.))

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Uzondiza ukhuphuke ileli lomsebenzi, Uze ukhohlise umphathi. (isitebhisi sokudlala, indebe, okusho ukukhula komsebenzi, kusukela esitolo samahlaya)

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Letha imibala enemibala empilweni yakho - jabula, phila njengasenganekwaneni! (abacwebezelayo).

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Kwangathi kungaba unyaka omatasatasa, ubuciko, Awu, ungakhohlwa ukuphumula, wena (uswidi) siyaphatha!

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Ukwazi, Iphi iholo lomyeni wami?, ubhala phansi imfucuza (ngepeni).

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Vumela iziko lilondoloze, ukuxosha izinkinga, umvikeli wakho nomqaphi uyingelosi enhle! (umfanekiso wengelosi).

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Lesi sipho siyigugu kuwe - sizoqala isilawuli kude, ithoshi lizokhanya. Ngamunye wethu uzojabula ngalokhu, phela nekhamera izosebenza nayo! (ibhethri).

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Ukuze ukwazi ukuvula ingidi yenhliziyo yakho ethandekayo, thatha entsha njengesikhumbuzo (i-keychain).

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Ekilasini, lapho isithukuthezi singena, thola eyakho (ICube kaRubik).

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Unenhlanhla enkulu - thola eyakho (indiza enophephela emhlane).

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Uma ukholelwa ezimangalisweni, yiba isangoma ngokwakho! Thatha induku yakho, emangalisayo imilingo! (ukotini efihlekile).

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Ukukhohlisa umngane, futhi mhlawumbe ushaye i-jackpot, kubalulekile ukuqonda ngesikhathi, Nini (ukudlala amakhadi) yithole!

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Konke kuzoba ngcono, konke onyakeni (uphawu lonyaka) Ngizoyithanda. (uphawu lwesikhumbuzo sonyaka ozayo)

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Eseyihambile lendlela, sekuyisikhathi sokuqala kusukela ekuqaleni. (incwadi yokubhalela, incwadi yokubhalela)

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Ukubamba iqhaza komuntu yingwenya, isiphetho sikunikeza amaphiko. Mamatheka, thatha amaphiko, ungavumeli izitha ezimbi. (inkunzi ebomvu)

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Khumbula isaga: odakwa emcimbini, uzobuyela endlini ngaphandle kwesikhathi. Ngakho-ke unganciki kuyo futhi ungakhohlwa ukuba ne-snack. (imfoloko)

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Futhi umthakathi wakukhumbuza, umndeni, iziko lomlilo. (ikhandlela eliwugqinsi)

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Inconyelwe ukugula kwakho, zivikele wena nabo bonke abakuzungezile. (ilamuna, ugaliki)

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Noma ngabe iyiphi inkinga, umphathe kangcono. Hhayi-ke ukuze kungabikho ukudideka, gcina impande ye-horseradish. (impande ye-horseradish)

Ilotho kuma-couplets

isibambo

Lena entsha incwadi yokubhalela
Njalo yigcine ihlelekile.

Ubani odinga insipho?, odinga i-candy wrapper, Futhi ukutholile khothama
!

Woza kimi masinyane: Wena isethi yamapensela
!

Umata opendiwe omangalisayo, Wena iduku
!

I-albhamu
noma ubani angayisebenzisa, Kodwa kuphela uma ungavilaphi! (umklomelo - sketchbook)

Epulazini inothiphedi
iyohlala isiza, Kodwa awudingi ukuziqhenya ngesipho!

Okwakho i-flashlight ye-keychain
, Muhle futhi uyakhanya kakhulu.

Kwangathi amazinyo akho angakhazimula, Iphunga elimnandi, eqinile, ihlanzekile! (umklomelo - umuthi wokuxubha)

Uma ugeza njalo, Lokho indwangu yokuwasha
woza kahle!

Vumela inhliziyo yakho ivuthe, kanje ikhandlela
.

Kanje isikhwama sezimonyo
Noma iyiphi intombazane izoyidinga!

Ungabhala nabo, upende. Woza ngokushesha ukuze uthole ukumangala kwakho! (umklomelo - iqoqo lamapeni anemibala)

Isibuko
, Impela, akusona isipho esibi. Kodwa hlala uhlale uwena!

Uma ikamela
ngikunike, Shaggy (-ym) ngeke usakwazi ukuhlala!

Uhlaka lwesithombe
kuyoba usizo kuwo wonke umuntu. Ngikutholele yona. Kodwa asikho isidingo sokuziqhenya!

Namathela phezulu izitika
ebhukwini lokubhalela, Esitulweni, ngenkomishi, embhedeni.

Uma inkumbulo yakho isebenza, kubhale phansi… nakuzibuthe! (umklomelo - inothiphedi kukazibuthe)

Ubunjani wena, uzoba ngubani kamuva, Uzokhuluma ngawe i-albhamu yezithombe
.

Amabhola ensipho
izondiza, Ukuletha injabulo kuwe nakwabanye!

Kanye, ezimbili, ezintathu - beka imininingwane, Ukuze babe isithombe. (umklomelo - puzzle)

Ngaphandle Ibhande yokunamathisela
awukwazi ukudlula. Yamukela futhi umamatheke ngokushesha!

Kunezipho ezahlukene lapha, Futhi ukutholile umaka
.

Into yemfashini kakhulu, Yiluke kumsila we-pigtail! (umklomelo - umnsalo noma uthayi wezinwele)

Amalotho amahlaya emavesini anemiklomelo yezingane

Ngomcimbi wezingane udinga ukukhetha ukuzijabulisa okuningi nokuzijabulisa okuhlukahlukene. Ilotho yokuhlonipha uNcibijane 2022 Ngeke kube nzima ukuchitha unyaka eqenjini lezingane, into esemqoka ukukhetha izipho ezifanele, kanye namaphaphu, imibhalo elula necacile yamathikithi. Ungakhetha izinketho ezilandelayo ezingokomfanekiso njengezipho zezingane::

• amaswidi nezithelo;
• izincwadi zokubhala ezincane;
• amathoyizi;
• izesekeli zezemidlalo.

Amathikithi kufanele akhishwe ngokugqamile, futhi uhlele umdwebo ngokwawo kanje, ukuze izingane zingacikeki, ngakho-ke, udinga ukubabandakanya emdlalweni wegeyimu ngangokunokwenzeka. Ukuze uthole ilotho ungasebenzisa imibhalo yezinkondlo enikezwe ekukhethweni.

“Umuhle futhi uyalalela, Kulungile, udlile iphalishi lakho! Awumcasulanga mama! Thola ikesi lakho lepensela maduze!».

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“Awuzange umcasule mama, Amsize endlini yonke, Bengilalela unyaka wonke, Thola incwadi yakho yokubhalela maduze!».

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“USanta Claus wagijima ngesihlibhi, Ukuze ugcwalise isifiso sakho! Ibhola lilethwe ngesileyi! Thola umklomelo wakho maduze!».

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“Manje usungakwazi ukudweba abalingiswa bakho bezinganekwane obathandayo, Ukuze ungadinwa, Bamba opende be-watercolor!».

*** ***

“Uma ufuna ukuba namandla, Akumele sikhohlwe imidlalo! Asinandaba nezipho, Thola i-jump rope yakho maduze!».

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“Sesiside isikhathi sililindile leli holide., Sekuyisikhathi eside ephuthelwe, Kuzoba unyaka wenjabulo, umnandi Ngaloshokoledi omnandi!».

*** ***

“Sesiside isikhathi sililindile leli holide, Kuhlotshiswe isihlahla sikaKhisimusi ngokugqamile! USanta Claus washesha wazungeza umhlaba futhi wakulethela uswidi!».

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“Emazweni ashisayo ukhule wavuthwa weza kithi ezophumula! Kumnandi, elimnandi, elikhanyayo, Iwolintshi esiphweni sakho!».

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“Kumakhaza kakhulu ngaphandle kwefasitela., Isiphepho seqhwa, umoya oneqhwa! Kodwa njengesipho uzothola isinkwa se-ginger esipendiwe setiye!».

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“Bewulalela unyaka wonke, Umuhle impela! Nesipho sakho sesifikile - Bright, igolo elimnandi!».

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“Sweetie uwine isipho, Uyadla futhi uyakhanya, Wena, kungenzeka, uzokujabulela ukudla le marmalade!».

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“Uthole umklomelo omkhulu, Okumnandi, emnandi, elimnandi! Thola ama-marshmallows akho ngokushesha, Phatha abangani bakho!».

Win-win ilotho kaNcibijane yabantu abadala

Uhlelo lokuzijabulisa lukaNcibijane lwababukeli abadala kufanele lufake nelotho. Win-win ilotho kaNcibijane yabantu abadala – lesi yisizathu sokuhleka, futhi usebenzise ingqondo yakho, thola umklomelo wokukhuthaza kukho konke.

Imithetho yelotho

• Ilotho yenkampani ejabulisayo ilula kakhulu. Udinga ukubhala izinkondlo eziyizimfumbe emaphepheni amancane. Wasonge uwafake ebhokisini noma esigqokweni. Ungasebenzisa izithombe ezinhle noma amakhadi okuposa, ngemuva obhala amagama.
• Khetha umethuli, ozothwala isigqoko, nokufunda izinkondlo. Kungaba njengomuntu oyedwa, ngakho ezimbili.
• Kufanele nishintshane ngokuya kumdlali, ngalokho, ukuze akhiphe enye yazo, bese ufunda umbhalo. Ngaphambi komhlanganyeli ngamunye, amathikithi elotho kufanele axutshwe kahle.
• Umethuli kumele afunde inkondlo enamazwi, kodwa yeka ngaphambi kwezwi lokugcina, Lokho, ekhipha ipheshana, kufanele ukuqagela. Kwenqatshelwe ngokuphelele ukumnika izeluleko.
• Nikeza umklomelo.

Izinkondlo zamathikithi elotho kaNcibijane

Ulindelwe ubuthongo obumnandi,
Uma uzivikela
I, Yebo izindlebe zakho,
Sikunikeza...(berushi).

Ukuze uhehe wonke umuntu ngokumamatheka,
Ukuze ungabi namahloni ngokuhleka kwakho,
Ukuze ukumamatheka "kungaguli",
Udinga … (umuthi wokuxubha)

Asinandaba nezijeziso,
Sifuna ukushiswa yilanga,
Ukwenza indiza ikhululeke,
Sinikeza okomuntu siqu... (indiza).
(ithoyizi)

Abasoze baphuma esitayeleni,
Futhi ngeke bathole uthuli esifubeni sabadwebi,
Eduze namabhuzu, njengamasokisi
Awudingi uku-ayina... (izintambo).

Gcoba amajikijolo avuthiwe
Bese sizokwenza isigqoko.
Uzokwazi konke okusemhlabeni,
Uma ufunda... (ephephandabeni)

Nakhona emlonyeni kudlala ngobunyoninco
Impandla yanamuhla,
Futhi uma uluma kuwo, awu ngamazinyo...
Thola... (ama-chupa-chups).

Igolide nokububula,
Bese kuba buhlungu isisu sami,
Kuzojabulisa indoda
Kuyabanda... (Ikani likabhiya).

Ukuvuka kamuva,
Ukuze singajoli emabhasini
Ukuze ungayeki izinzwa zakho zokupompa,
Sikunikeza amakhadi ebhizinisi lamatekisi... iphakethe!
noma "sizokunikeza imoto epholile" (imoto yezingane).

Uma ungakwazi ukugibela ibhasi,
Futhi iphunga labanye liyakuphazamisa.
Kuzokuvikela ephunga njalo
Isipho sethu (... imaski yegesi).
(noma imaski yezokwelapha)

Bonke abesifazane kufanele babe nayo,
Ukuze indoda ingabi eyempi,
Ukuze umyeni wakho angalokothi abe mnyama,
Hlakulela lokhu okumnandi... (omisiwe).

Uvame ukungcola, kanye nezandla
Ebhulukweni indoda ikhipha
Iletha emigodini nasemifudlaneni,
Ugqinsi oluwugqinsi lugijima.
Noma ngabe kwenzekani kanje – ukuze zisetshenziswe esikhathini esizayo
Sinikeza okuhlanzekile... (iduku).

Kohl kusuka ku-sclerosis evamile
IGlucose ayikusizi,
Ifindo eliboshwe kuphela elingakusindisa,
Sikunikeza lokhu. (iduku)
(wesibeletho noma emakhaleni)

Ukuhlangana namadlozi
Izothunyelwa kuwe maduze
Sizokunikeza ithikithi lokungena,
Leli phekhi... (ugwayi)

Ukumisa imibimbi enwabuzelayo,
Ukuze umyeni angahambi ngaphandle kwesizathu
Uzokubuyisela ebuntwaneni unomphela,
Lezi zingane ezinhle ... (ukhilimu).

Ezinweleni ezincane ezi-blond
Amasoseji abekwe,
Izoncibilika emlonyeni wakho ngaphandle kwamahloni
Isiqu esiwugqinsi... (ukolweni).

Khotha kancane futhi izosukuma,
Khona-ke udinga ukufaka ngokushesha,
Futhi izimbobo uzozithola yena,
Futhi kuzokukhulula ekukhathazekeni.
Sibeka abesifazane ngaphansi kwesihlahla sikaKhisimusi,
Njengesipho... (intambo nenaliti).

Izinkondlo ezimfishane

Ukuze ushintshe ukuhamba kwakho
Sikunikeza ibhodlela... (i-vodka)

Kuzwakala kunjani ukuba sultan?
Kujabulele... (ihuka).

Ukuze uthenge imoto epholile,
Sikunikeza... (iphakethe lemali)
(Izikweletu zesikhumbuzo)

Ukuvala imvelo yakho
Sikunikeza lezi... (izikweletu).
(izikhumbuzo)

Kuyoba usizo ukugwazisa
Thatha i-cognac... (Napoleon).

Ukuze kube nokuthula nokuzwana ekhishini
Yamukela ngepuleti... (isitifiketi).

Kungani udinga amathosti nezinkondlo?
Kungcono ukwamukela... (amakha).

Ukuze kube nephunga elimnandi ngoSuku Lonyaka Omusha
Sizomnika maduze... (i-cologne).

Ukuze umshini wokunyathelisa ungakuphoxi,
Yamukela ukubhalisa kwakho ku... (indawo yokuzivocavoca)

Win-win ilotho kaNcibijane yabantu abadala

Kusele amahora ambalwa kuphela kuze kudwetshwe inani lerekhodi lemali emlandweni waseRussia. Ngalesi sikhathi imiklomelo eyinhloko kanye nemidwebo emikhulu izogxilwa kulotho eyintandokazi kakhulu phakathi kwamaRussia - "Ilotho YaseRussia" (1212 ukujikeleza). Futhi, njengangonyaka odlule, Kuzokhishwa imiklomelo ebiza ngaphezu kwesigidigidi. I-jackpot enkulu kangaka nokukhangisa okusabalele, kubhebhethekisa intshisekelo enkulu kulo mcimbi.

Kulesi sihloko sizobheka ngokuningiliziwe ilotho kaNcibijane "Ilotho YaseRussia" yebhiliyoni, ake sikhumbule ukuthi siyidlala kanjani, uma umuntu engazi, futhi nokuthi ungalithenga kuphi futhi kanjani ithikithi lelotho.

Yile ndlela ebukeka ngayo uhlelo lukaNcibijane lwe-Russian Lotto Billion

WINA-WIN LOTHO yosuku lokuzalwa lwezingane 7-10 iminyaka

Imiklomelo ipakishwa ezikhwameni ezicwebezelayo, Ngamunye unombhalo onamathiselwe..
Igundane (ithoyizi elithambile)
Ukhathele ukufunda?,
Kungenza ngifune ukudlala?
Kusho, nakanjani izofika kahle
Lokho, ngifuna ukukuphani.
Khumbula ubuntwana bakho begolide:
Inkulisa nobhodwe...
UTeddy bear ungcwele,
Ungawi phansi, umngane.

Isikhwama semali
Uma ufaka imali ephaketheni lakho,
Wonke amasela nesikhohlakali
Kuhle, Impela, eyebiwe.
Le nto ngeke ikudumaze,
Uma kunembobo ephaketheni lakho,
“Imali” yakho nayo izoshabalala.
Isikhwama semali sigcwele
Kungcono ukukufaka esikhwameni sakho.
Izimonyo
Into ebaluleke kakhulu.
Ungaphenduka umthakathi,
Hhayi-ke, uma wazi ukuthi kufanele ume nini,
Ungaba muhle.

Inja (ithoyizi elithambile)
Ngaphandle kwakhe ufana nongenazandla,
Lona umngane wakho othembekile.
Akakhonkothe, ayilumi,
Kodwa akulula.

Ukuqashwa komfundi osezingeni eliphezulu (kukhona ibhande elastiki kuwo, i-ambulensi...)
Uyafisa ukuba umfundi osezingeni eliphezulu??
Uthola isikhuthazo esihle,
Ziningi izinto ezinhle ezahlukene.
Hhayi-ke, qhubekela phambili ekuseni!
Irabha
Uma izinhlamvu ziyi-squiggles,
Bese ungibamba ezandleni zakho,
Ngokusho kwephepha, i-hop ne-hop,
Nali iphepha elihlanzekile!

I-ambulensi
Ngokhuni futhi mncane,
Ngizokala ngisho nendlovu,
Ngisho nendlu inezitezi eziningi,
Uma ibalulekile. Inkawu
Uma uzibuka esibukweni
Futhi ngesikhathi esifanayo uthi:
"Mfowethu, Angimuhle!»,
Konke kuzoba ngcono ngokushesha.
Kuyena bheka nje
Nasemqhudelwaneni "Nkosazana" hamba!

Inkawu
Uma uzibuka esibukweni
Futhi ngesikhathi esifanayo uthi:
"Mfowethu, Angimuhle!»,
Konke kuzoba ngcono ngokushesha.
Mbuke nje
Futhi uye emncintiswaneni kaMiss!

Umklomelo omnandi (noma yimaphi amaswidi)
Uthole umklomelo omnandi,
Zisize, Wenze kahle, bis!
Uma uthanda ushokoledi,
Uzojabula ngendlela emangalisayo.
Uma ungakuthandi, akunandaba.
Ubaba uzoyidla ke.

Kwabesilisa (iqanjwe ngokufanelekile ushokoledi kanye nempushana yezinyo)
Uma uthanda amaswidi,
Nakanjani uzomosha amazinyo.
Impushana inikezwa wena!
Udokotela wamazinyo - angikwazi ukulinda
Gcoba izinyo elimnyama.
Xubha amazinyo akho, leyo!

Ababili kweyodwa (imiklomelo emibili ephaketheni elilodwa)
Lesi sipho asijwayelekile,
Ibukeka inemibala futhi igqamile,
Awu, yini ngaphakathi?,
Kungcono ubheke ekhaya.

Imbobo puncher
Uma kudingeka imbobo,
Chofoza futhi nangu yena.
Ungenza i-confetti,
Vele uyithathe uyifune!

Incwadi (Incwadi yombala enezimoto)
Uma ungumshayeli enhliziyweni,
Usuthanda ukushayela isikhathi eside,
Khetha imoto yakho:
Iminyango, umzimba kanye nendlu ...
Ungakwazi ngisho nokukhetha umbala.
Kubi, kuphela awekho amalungelo esikhwameni.

Insipho
Uma i-jeans ingakulingani,
Ungajahi ukuwasika,
Into encane le
Izokusiza ukuthi uzigqoke.

Amagilavu (irabha)
Lesi sipho asijwayelekile,
Ithambile futhi ihlanzekile.
Ayigqoke ahambe,
Lapho ithoyilethi elingageziwe lilinda khona.

Amazinyo (i-marmalade)
Uma amazinyo akho aba mancane,
Uphukile, yandiza yahamba,
Ngeke uthole okungcono kunalezi,
Uzovele umoshe isikhathi.

Ithoyizi
Ngiyithoyizi elijabulisayo,
Hhayi inja, hhayi Parsley,
Ngingubani mina? Qagela ngokushesha
Futhi udlale ngami!

I-Scrunchy
Super imfashini into,
Yiluke kumsila we-pigtail.
Wonke umuntu uzothi - enhle,
Futhi uzoyithanda wena.

I-Caramelka
Ngiyi-caramel elula,
Kumnandi, edonsa,
Ngihlafune isonto lonke
Kulo mcimbi.

Ibhola
Ibhola lilula futhi linomoya
Ungalifaki ngaphansi komcamelo wakho,
Ngale kwalokho uzobanga umsindo ongaka,
Ukuthi umakhelwane ngemuva kodonga uzohefuzela.

Iphepha lasendlini yangasese
Umklami ojabulisayo!
Futhi awudingi umfundisi.
Ungakwazi ukusonta rose,
Ungenza imibhalo ngendlela oyifisayo.
Futhi uma uyisonga emzimbeni,
Ungadlala umama.

Amasokisi
Kusuka osizini nasekulangazeleleni
Amasokisi kaTerry akho.

Ama-ruble amahlanu
Ngiyi-nickel ne-dime,
Angifuni ukungena esifubeni.
Ngokushesha ugijimela endaweni yokudayisa
Futhi uthenge okuthile.

Umaka (ophuzi)
Umfula, ihlathi, utshani obukhulu,
Ngizodweba noma yini.
I-Cherkana enopende ophuzi,
Nami ngizodweba inyanga.

Ikhalenda
Ikhalenda lincane, Kodwa kude.
Izokukhombisa usuku nonyaka,
Uhlala kuzo zonke izindlu.

Ipulasitiki
Wonke umuntu uyazi plasticine kusukela ebuntwaneni.,
Ungakwazi ukwenza ifa,
Nenkomo, kanye nokhozi,
Ukube bekukhona owesifazane onamandla!

Incwadi yokubhalela
Le notebook entsha
Idinga ukugcinwa ngokulandelana,
Hhayi-ke, uma ubhala kuwo,
Ungaba i-slob.

Glue
Iglue ewuketshezi njengesipho,
Nansi eminye imibono:
Ungayisebenzisa ukwenza iphepha lodonga,
Ithayela, amathayili nokunye.

Isi-Scotch
Uma ufuna ukunciphisa umzimba,
Udinga nje ukuyifuna.
Njengoba ubona isangweji,
Vala umlomo ngokushesha.

Iphini lokugqoka
Uma uyisigelekeqe esithile
Ebusuku isibhamu siyasongela,
Ncinza indlebe,
Uzobaleka ngaso leso sikhathi.

Ushingamu
Uma uhlezi kulezi zinto,
Bese umemeza: "Usale kahle, ibhulukwe!»
Uyaphafuza futhi ukhuhla ize,
Umba umgodi nje.

Inhlanzi (imifanekiso, ekhula emanzini)
Uma ukhuluma isiShayina,
Uhumusha kakhulu noma ngaphansi,
Lokho ngaphandle kobunzima
Izinhlanzi zizokhula ngaleso sikhathi.

Iduku
Uma unekhala unyaka wonke,
Lesi sipho sizokusindisa.

Uswidi
Kule nto encane
Kugcinwe injabulo engaka!
Ungalaleli odokotela,
Yidle futhi ube nempilo.

Ilotho yomshado yabasanda kushada: ukusatshalaliswa kwemisebenzi

Miningi imiqhudelwano yomshado wesintu, okuya ngokuya kuncipha isidingo. Abasanda kushada ngokuvamile bayenqaba ukubamba umncintiswano “womfana noma wentombazane”, ukweba izicathulo, njll.. Impela uzwile ngomdlalo, lapho umakoti nomkhwenyana banquma phakathi kwabo, ubani onamiphi imithwalo yemfanelo ekuphileni komkhaya?. Izinketho eziningi, Ngokwesibonelo, ukuvota okuvulekile - abasanda kushada bekhulisa i-rose emhlophe nebomvu noma onodoli ababili, efanekisela owesilisa nowesifazane. Siphakamisa ukuhlela lo mncintiswano ojabulisayo ngendlela yokuwina ilotho yokuwina, lapho ngenhlanhla wonke umuntu ethola umthwalo wemfanelo

Lapho ulungiselela, naka:

Incazelo yezinsiza. Amathikithi elotho angenziwa amabhaluni anamanothi, okuyodingeka bashintshane ngokudla abasanda kushada. Inketho ethokozisayo ngokulinganayo kungaba ukukhipha umthwalo wakho wemfanelo ngaphandle kwebhokisi elivamile.. Izinyanda zingalengiswa entanjeni.

Ukulungiswa kwezibopho

Kubalulekile ukuthi ungadluli lapha., ukuze umncintiswano ungadonseli phambili. 10-12 kuzoba nezibopho ezanele

Izinketho zamahlaya zihlala zibalulekile.

Uma abasanda kushada beqala ukuzwakalisa isibopho sabo ngekheli lethenda komunye nomunye ("sthandwa sami, Ngenxa yakho, ngilungile nsuku zonke...", "Kuyabiza, Ngikuthanda ngokuhlanya futhi ngizokuthanda. ”…), umncintiswano uzokwenzeka esimweni sothando nakakhulu.

Uhlu lwezithembiso empilweni yomndeni

1. Indawo yokuphumula kusofa phambi kwe-TV.
2. Akukho okumele ukwenze.
3. Ukuhlanza nothuli.
4. Siyakwamukela ekhaya uvela emsebenzini ngesidlo sakusihlwa esimnandi.
5. Pamper futhi ujabule.
6. Ukugeza izitsha njalo.
7. Hamba nawe ekuthengeni kwakho kwamasonto onke.
8. Phila ikhofi elimnandi.
9. Phatha izandla zakho.
10. Ukumangala kuze kube ukuguga.

Sikholelwa ngobuqotho, ukuthi ukubamba ilotho yomshado kuzonikeza umgubho wakho umoya wobungane nemfudumalo ngempela. Impela, izivakashi zakho zizoyijabulela ngempela inqubo. Ilotho enjalo yokuwina-win ingabanjwa hhayi kuphela ngosuku lomshado, kanye nesikhumbuzo noma usuku lomshado.

http://xn—-7sbdclcebc2ac8c5b3j.xn--p1ai/svadba/shutochnaya_lotereya_v_stikhakh_na_svadbu_dlya_gostey_i_rodstvennikov.htmlhttp://tamada.expert/provedenie/svadebnyj-banket/razvlecheniya/svadebnaya-lotereya-veselaya-zabava-dlya-suprugov-i-gostej.html://svadebka.ws/article/svadebnaya-lotereya/

Ilotho evesini Inketho No. 2

Insipho

Ukuze ungadinwa, Sikunikeza ucezu lwensipho! Kuzoba khona okuthile okugcina izandla zakho zimatasa, Asikho neze isikhathi sokudinwa lapha!

I-Scanword

Ukuxazulula scanwords, Ulwazi oludingekayo luwubumnyama nje! Siyazi, uzophula amarekhodi ukuze ube nokushesha kwengqondo!

Izintambo

Asikho isidingo soku-ayina nhlobo. Ngokuphambene nazo zonke iseluleko.! Vumela lezi zindwangu zemfashini zibe nawe!

Incwadi yokubhalela

Ukuze ukunikezwa kwephepha kungafudumeza umphefumulo wakho, Sikunikeza le notebook emangalisayo ngaphandle kokuhlupheka.!

Iyogathi

Iyogathi ibhizinisi elinenzuzo, Ukube nginemali, ukuthenga! Kodwa akufanele uchithe imali yakho, Singakunikeza!

ukumunca uswidi

Amabhele ancela udladla kanye nephapila lomntwana, Futhi uyamunca Sthandwa sethu, qhwaqa!

Toilet paper roll

Ukugcina idayari kuyimfashini, Asiphikisani ngalokho! Kulula ukuyibhala ku-roll efana nale! Phela, kuyo ungakwazi ukufihla ngokuthembekile imfihlo yakho, Ukuze kungabikho muntu ofaka ikhala lakhe ngephutha empilweni yakho!

Ikhofi esikhwameni

Yeka ukuphelelwa amandla Uyokwenza njalo! Kuke kwaba khona ukushoda, Ibizwa nge "Coffee"! Ngakho, sinikeza ukushoda, Kwangathi angagcina amandla akhe!

Isisuli

Ukuphila ngezinye izikhathi, njengoba kwaziwa, Iqukethe izinto ezincane, Yingakho kuthandeka kangaka ukuthola lesi sipho! Noma kuyinto encane, Kuhle, Ingabe uzoyisebenzisa ukuze usule amabala?!

Uswidi

Akekho oyoke akunike uswidi kanjalo nje! Kumele uwufanele lo mvuzo, ngokuvamile, Njalo! Simane sikukhonze futhi sikunikeze uswidi!